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The Five Love Languages Gave Me The Confidence

I have to thank The Five Love Dialects by Gary Chapman for our marriage of 4 years. The great thing that has happened to me is my husband and daughter.

I met my hubby at 35. Till then, I think I was destined to live alone. As much as I had wanted to get married and share my life with someone special, I really didn’t have got any hopes of meeting that individual. Till the age of 30, no guys came my way. When they finally did, they were definitely the wrong ones. By 33, I was really disappointed. I had been to a few clairvoyants to get a concept about my future in the aspect of marriage. What I heard definitely wasn’t what I had wanted to hear. For 2 years, I wallowed in my bad luck. Sure enough, what the clairvoyants had informed me was coming true. I wasn’t meeting any prospective husbands whatsoever.

A few months before I turned thirty-five, I woke up one morning and decided I was going to consider one last time to meet someone. If I didn’t meet anyone, a minimum of I could tell myself that I experienced tried. I was going to shut out what the clairvoyants had told me. Besides, what they had predicted didn’t necessarily have to come true. I started imagining being with a Caucasian man. Visualisation of my life partner is something I had done from the age of 14. However , I broke the exercise upon listening to the clairvoyants.

We picked up the courage to start online dating again. However , I was gripped by fear. “How do I know the partnership won’t end up in disaster? What if this person is a jerk like all the other ones I had met? “, I asked myself.

One of my good friends who had been through hell before settling lower and leading a happy marriage told me to read some self-help books. She told me to read The 5 Love Languages. I purchased the book almost immediately.

I was impressed by what The Five love Different languages gave me. It’s no surprise that lots of lovers struggle with their differences. This book offered me an idea on how to work through these distinctions.

In my previous failed relationships, both my boyfriends and I knew precisely what we had wanted but we did not make much of an attempt to help one another achieve what we wanted.

This book offered me very valuable knowledge on how lovers express and receive love. It teaches us how to fulfill each other’s emotional needs. The 5 love languages are

words of affirmation
acts of service
quality time
receiving gifts
physical contact

Words of affirmation
Some people need appreciation through words. The more spoken praises and beautiful words they hear, the more satisfaction they gain in the relationship.

Quality time
Some people desire their partners to spend time with them and give them undivided care plus attention during this period. If their partners are usually distracted by the tv or the newspaper, they fail to fill their adored ones’ love tanks.
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Receiving presents
Some people place a lot of value within the gifts they receive. The more thought the partner puts into the present, the more gratification that’s received. If you notice that your partner is big upon gifts, it’s definitely worth getting an organiser or diary to help remind you of important dates like birthdays and anniversaries. You don’t wish to be at the risk of forgetting to obtain a gift.

Acts of Service
For some, the amount of love received is scored by the amount of chores their partners do for them. Cooking, cleaning, working errands, driving them around along with other acts of service go a considerable ways.

Physical touch
Physical contact such as hugs, kisses, strokes and pats are seen as acts of love by some people. The more physical contact the partner gives, the more cherished they feel. These people thrive with very tactile partners.

What this guide gave me was definitely an eye-opener. Being equipped with this knowledge, I gained some confidence to be in the relationship again. I was able to identify the love languages of the guys I dated and also identify when they could fulfill my love languages.

Once i finally met my man, I knew that I was ready for a relationship and a commitment. I knew what his love languages were and how well I could fulfill them. Likewise, I was also aware of exactly how well he could fulfill my love dialects. I must admit that both people had difficulty in fulfilling some of the love languages. Having said that, The Five Love Languages had given all of us the skill to work at the really like languages we lacked in.

Both of us have come a long way since our wedding almost 4 years ago. We have made an effort to improve the adore languages that we were weak in. We aren’t looking back but forward as we know that we have the knowledge and skills to make each day a better 1.

To all couples out there, The Five Love Languages is a book you should read. If you are discouraged by failed relationships, this book will give you an insight in to how you could make your next relationship prosperous. If you are afraid to go into a connection, this book will give you an idea into how you could make one work.

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